Reiki & Sociopathy or Psychopathy

This is a subject that has been bothering me for over 30 years and the past 5 with regards to Reiki. Where do sociopaths and psychopaths fit into the religious, spiritual and energy healing realms?

If a sociopath/psychopath doesn't have a conscious and cannot empathize with other sentient beings, be they plant, animal or human, and cannot develop any regard for either his/her own or another's well-being, how can they develop compassion?

There has been research that shows definite physiological differences in the brain structure and neurochemical makeup between "normal" human brains and the brains of serial killers. It appears that that portion of their brain that would normally "feel" what other people feel (pain, fear, pleasure) is turned off. Is it possible to turn it on? It would appear through research into attempts to modify their behavior that psychopathic brains are "hardwired" and that they are born that way - that once a psychopath, always a psychopath.

Of course, serial killers are psychopaths in the extreme. There are varying degrees of psychopathy, from the "harmless" success-driven boss we've all worked for at one time or another, who will abuse and step over employees and anyone else who gets in the way on their rise to the top, to the politicians we all know and love, who never keep their campaign promises - to child molesters parading as teachers or clergymen who see nothing wrong with compromising the trust and innocence of the young children they're in charge of protecting.

Where do these people fit in with, quote, normal humans, unquote, who do love, who do feel empathy and who do feel a responsibility to their fellow man? Frankly, having worked in the legal and justice system for over 20 years before I retired (and perhaps that's colored my world too much), I think society needs to be protected against these predators. But how do I, as a practicing Christian/Buddhist Reiki practitioner fit this aberrant behavior into my definition or "view," if you will, of the world and my commitment (and I am still learning at this point) to feel love and compassion toward all living things?

I find it very hard to have compassion for a human who operates more like a machine than a human being. I don't necessarily feel hatred or contempt toward them. I feel bewilderment, more than anything. I find a comparison between the sociopath/psychopath and the Great White Shark - just eating machines with no guilt about the damage they inflict or indeed any capacity to feel sorry for anyone who happens to get caught in their path. Just gobble 'em up and move on to the next "meal." I feel a need to protect my family and society against the harm of a psychopath, much as I would protect my family against a marauding bear. Lock 'em up and throw away the key. Of course, I wouldn't lock the marauding bear up, I'd just move it somewhere where there were no humans or I would shoot it dead rather than let it kill another human being. (Oh, I really did say that?!!)

How am I supposed to feel about a sociopath or a psychopath? How am I supposed to fit them into my rose-colored Reiki view of the world? Does Reiki "work" on them? If behavior modification, God and spirituality can't change their hearts and minds, what are we supposed to do with them? And if there is a "God" (which I believe there is, but not in the classical sense), why would S/He create defective spiritual beings with no capacity for spiritual growth? If indeed growing spiritually is why we're here in the first place. Are they here to teach us love and compassion (while they're choking the life out of us in some deserted backwoods?).

Am I making sense at all? Sorry, for the long post, but is anyone else struggling with this seeming paradox? I haven't found an satisfactory answer for it yet.

Wow! I'm in a class all day today and will respond to your post as soon as I am able (it may be a day or so).

A great topic, and great post. It's the only reason why i'm going to share what i am.

Just for your benefit Mish, check this topic about me: http://www.reikilearninglounge.com/t447-being-born

Also, a very recent one, which all of you are free to read also is: http://combatingcrime.wordpress.com/

It can be saw, that i fully immersed myself in Crime, drugs, etc, for 13 years.

what i havn't shared online, until now, is that i was also placed in secure mental hospitals, diagnosed as a sociopath, with the psychiatrists attempting to get me admitted to a maximum security hospital for the criminally insane.

Of course, i wont go into details really about much of this. Can i just say though, that every single living thing in existence deserves Gods grace, and there is always hope that a person can change for the better. Loadsa you folks on here know me, one or two have meet me, lots i talk with regular. You know what i'm about. I'm opinionated, too direct at times, but yet, even though i have different views, most know my motivations.

Within a few weeks, Reiki helped me with this. Aww, what the heck, i'll write a part 2 to my 'Being Born' topic later, going into some more detail, just to better illustrate how dramatic things can be. With the caveat - my experience isn't all experiences, only a possible one.

what i'd really like to thank you for, is being the catlyst that is bringing me to use myself as an example. Warts & all.

warmest wishes
Wayne

Wayne, thank you for being so candid. I read your other post and your blog. Your perspective was just what I needed to hear.

I have always felt that if I am to believe in a God and in loving compassion, I needed to believe that there is a small amount of humanity in even the most hardened criminal. You are the proof of the transformation that love can bring about. When I say love, of course, I'm talking about the all-encompassing compassion that we think of when we think of God, a Higher Power, the Enlightened Motive, whatever you choose to call it. That book you read on Shamanism was infused with love. Words are powerful for good or for harm/evil. You were surrounded with love at your Reiki I class. Obviously you had a powerful connection with the Divine even though you didn't know it at the time, even at the same time you were committing crime. And I have to say I'm so glad you turned your life around and are here with us today.

So I have to believe that there is some divine in even the psychopath, even if their brains are "hardwired." If drugs can change our neuro-pathways and a Reiki attunement can change our physiology so that the hemoglobin and hematocrit levels of our blood change (referring to one of Prachamama's posts), then perhaps it can also alter brain structure.

Also, Wayne, as a side-note and bit of candidness of my own, I have not always been an "angel" myself. I used drugs recreationally in my twenties and had a bout with drinking in my forties. I was around a criminal element through association (my husband's friends), so got to see both sides. For the most part, the people my husband associated with were what I called "sub-criminal," meaning I considered them just dabblers in crime, doing it more as a result of opportunity or just plain convenience, i.e., it's more "convenient" to break into somebody's car and steal their stereo than it is to work for a boss you can't stand and sometimes you can make more money selling drugs than working a 9 to 5 job. At least that was their rationale. But I found that the one thing that they respected from me was my honesty, if that makes any sense, even though they weren't honest themselves. What they hated was a phony or someone talking down to them. What I will also say, though, that was very disturbing to me at the time was that they could be pleasant and treat me with respect, but then go out and burglarize a store or beat somebody up in a street fight. It was almost a depersonalization of the object of the crime, of sorts, which was something I learned about later after I began working in the legal system. I think that's why this question of what to do with the paradox of God/Compassion/Reiki versus psychopathy and antisocial behavior bothers me.

Anyway, thank you again for your honesty and I'll be interested in hearing what others have to say.

Namaste,

Hi Mish.

I'm really impressed with your opening post. I believe that for many, entering the practice of Reiki can be like taking a barefoot stroll on a new, plush, extra thick, extra soft carpet beneath one's bare feet. Your post dares to lift up the edge of that Reiki carpet to see what's been swept (and continues to grow) underneath that carpet, causing subtle lumps to be felt along the stroll.

For a very long time, Reiki has held the expectation that its teachers have long lived spiritual lives of purity, lives of spiritual ideals that serve as goals to the new students... but, unlike the extensive commitments of time, dedication and discipline required by Hindu Yogic practices, and the same plus academic commitments (and continuing ongoing education) required to become a Catholic priest, one can become a Certified Reiki Teacher within the span of a few keystrokes that permits a certificate to be automatically e-mailed to the typist. Got that certificate? Just open a free Yahoo! Group and begin teaching true, authentic Reiki… or even set up a group treatment space at a local church.

No Reiki teacher that I have met to this day performs criminal background checks--sexual predator background checks--on their potential students. As a spiritual practice that can involve a direct laying-on of hands to clients, a practice that opens the doorway to a lot of problems in the future. It's just a matter of time.

Reiki seems to hold the expectations that it's teachers are pure from the get-go, and individuals like myself, Wayne and now you, simply aren't supposed to be involved in it as anything other than a disciple (student) unable to ever emerge through their past. Stay in your place beneath your Reiki Teacher, and everything is where it should be.

The discrimination in the overall Reiki community against individuals who have undergone such experiences is also extended to those who have been victims of sexual abuse. There is no place that I have found at this time where victims of sexual abuse seeking healing through Reiki are allowed by the Reiki Teacher and/or Reiki group to fully emerge and heal through their past.

Religions such as Christianity offer ideals of forgiveness to psychopaths and sociopaths, but one needs only to watch the news to see activists protesting against a person who has served their time in prison… make the mistake once, and never emerge through it. Change is not allowed. Reiki is no different, except that Reiki seems to attract more people who are seeking and in need of mental healing than any other ailment or illness.

Wayne has taken a huge risk by taking the bold first-step to put himself out there on the firing line of the Reiki public, presenting problems of his past by fully disclosing them. I am in a similar situation, while although never involved in any criminal activity whatsoever, I was mentally disturbed enough in the past to go homeless and actually live in a homeless shelter for a brief (and transformative) period of time in my life. The truth is that unless a person takes complete ownership—complete responsibility—of their past, they can’t heal through it. Wayne has, I have, and your ability to openly share the transformative experiences of your past means that you have, too—which means you can serve as a beacon of healing light to others who are in, have been in, or may potentially travel along that path.

Like you, I like to believe that some element of humanity exists within even the psycho/sociopath, but I also admit that’s an ideal. I believe that everyone has the potential to change, to heal, to transform through their problems, but I also acknowledge that not everyone does (which unfortunately results in harm to others).

I currently live in the least desirable area in San Francisco: The Tenderloin. The Tenderloin was “the” place to be in San Francisco some 30-50 years ago, but today it is a repository for street-corner drug dealers who commute in from a neighboring city and low-scale transitional housing (the city places “homeless” individuals into hotel rooms and housing providing basic living needs) in this area. Each day, I see fresh human excrement (from each side) on the sidewalk, and it’s a surprise to not see some shirtless soul shooting some clear liquid into a vein in their forearm. Do I feel compassion?

Yes, but having been homeless, I’m also fully aware of the benefits each of those individuals are entitled to by the City (courtesy of the tax-payers). Free room and board. Free meals where one does not have to do the dishes afterwards. Free clothing. Complete a 12-week program sponsored by the City, and get an educational grant that is large enough to cover all necessary expenses to complete and earn a 2-year associates degree at the Community College, or even apply it to trade school.

The compassion I feel is completely different than the way I felt it before going homeless, and I am frequently reminded of the differences in that feeling of compassion each time I see someone well dressed in a business suit hand a homeless beggar standing near the subway gates a few dollars. I remember the time I spent in the homeless shelter when my roommates would brag about how much money they received from such good hearted souls, and then brag about the drugs they bought afterwards.

Before the homeless experience, I felt the only thing I could do was give money to help such a person out of their predicament. After the homeless experience, a sense of responsibility now accompanies the feelings of compassion that I feel.

I was homeless for four months during 2002. It’s now 2011, and I frequently walk past some of my former roommates who were not destroyed by their habits. They dance and sing in front of the art performance theaters, they beg at the subway stations, and they return home to the comfort of the shelter provided by the city and other non-profit organizations within the city. For reasons I don’t understand, they have not changed.

Now, when I’m asked for a donation by one of the homeless, I say that I donated to one of the many non-profits providing resources to them (and I do). When I’m asked for money to help them buy a meal, I provide directions to GLIDE Memorial Church where they can indulge themselves in all-you-can-eat meals completely free of charge.

Would I move a marauding bear to somewhere it could not hurt humans, or shoot it dead? Yeah, I would, too. It’s not the politically correct thing to say especially in the spiritual healing community, but it is the truth of necessity, the truth of responsibility. (Less than two days ago I watched a brief clip on the tele of a woman who had climbed inside the cage of some polar bears at a zoo and swam across their pool to pet them—she was not met with cute fuzzy snuzzling kisses as her intuition likely told her she would but rather teeth crushing into her shoulder and claws tearing open her skin).

I think that rather than offering something like unconditional loving kindness to psycho/sociopaths, I offer Responsible Compassion.

Hi,

I`ve had sociopaths in my inner circle in the past...psychopaths, and people with boarderline personality disorder, oh yeah, add a bi-polar person for added color. My compassion reaches far, and i have paid dearly for it at times...

In my personal experience...

Everyone of these people that i have known, has endured abuse on the level of criminal for an extensive period during their childhood. Abuse as bad as anything you can imagine. They have shared some of their stories with me. The folks I knew, would only allow themselves to feel emotion other than anger, when they were under the influence of drugs or alcohol. They needed to numb the pain to even take a glimpse of themselves, their past.

I have been stunned, and angered to the point of distraction from what i was told of the instances of abuse. I had never had any thoughts that one human could do that to another...honestly I had difficulty comprehending what i was hearing, because it was unimagineable. I cannot measure how one would survive and function at all...I give them credit, and my heart goes out to them...

Yet, at the same time...

They have common traits that parallel the abuse they suffered.

All these folks experienced O.B.E.s multiple times during sessions of abuse.They left their bodies, because a part of them, could not be witness to what was happening to them.

They absolutely are not there, emotionally for periods of time...and like it was said, they function in a way parallel to an unfeeling machine. There is really very little, if any compassion on any level, there is only a concern to satisfy their need to control their environment totally, and have domination over anyone or anything involved in their immediate needs...I think most can imagine where this control need comes from....

Makes me think the abuse they endured during their developemental years, may have affected brain developement...I think they are hardwired differently. Add to that, all the bad life choices they make along the way, due to their in ability to function in society right from the beginning. Substance abuse and all forms of self abuse reside with alot of these folks as well...

They would not accept a Reiki treatment from me...but they sucked it up in my presence big time...stressors would come to them, and Reiki would flow...

They were energy sensitive...and very empathic...

I enjoyed alot of the time I spent with them, they were fun to be around until...
..."the music stopped playing"...

I have much compassion for them, but they do irreverseble things to other individuals and society in general...damage one person, you`ve damaged us all.

Every predator i`ve known well, has been a victim, and see themselves as the victim always...just ask them.

They destroy and control..lie and deceive...corrupt the innocent, and seduce the unsuspecting....and much worse...They are not capable of not decieving themselves...they have moments of clarity that add to their anger, guilt and confusion.

And yes, they are someones son or daughter...someones father or mother...but they are still predators.

They are a test of compassion...and have tested me considerably. The folks I spent time with had tried councilling, bailed out and turned their back on society totally. Everything looks like a lie, when compassion and logic are no longer present...they trust no one. Without compassion OR logic you are adrift, ungrounded, crazy all day...and possibly, unsafe to be around. These people I have known, will continue to bring chaos and worse to those who are close to them. They will not work on themselves, and some no doubt, will destroy themselves before their natural life is over.

It`s easy to have compassion at arms length for everyone, and if you maintain that distance your compassion may never faulter.

Yet, if you get up close and personal with the people I`m talking about...you need to be well grounded, and question just about every statement they make...

Some people, just like some animals, need to be understood very well before you approach them, and you have to live a few days in their shoes to get a sense of them...not everyone can do that.

I will always help those who ask...but I will be watchful of the predators, they will ask for help, or so it will appear. Be sure it`s help they are looking for...

My experience and my advice for what it`s worth...



Jim

Thank you to all the above for being so open and honest!

My personal belief is, where there's breath there's hope.

I have a book at work written by a man who was severely abused by his own mother throughout his childhood. His mother could be deemed a sociopath/psycopath......to be honest I haven't read the book because I'm struggling with the idea of someone being horrendously abused by their own mother to begin with. But this chap, has gone on to give talks about happiness and forgiveness internationally, he's quite a guy! ( I can't remember his name or the name of the book off the top of my head) but I'll post his name after I get back from work. Perhaps his own story and the work he does now, will help others come to some kind of understanding in regards to forgiveness and compassion.

Perhaps I'll actually feel promted to read the book too.....

*ching* I've just remembered the name....a boy called it. Just looked it up and apparently there is a little controversy over the contents.....I don't have time now to read about the controversy....must get ready for work.

Great subject Mish, great questions, and equally great things shared by Wayne and Buck, making RLL a great place to become member of. Thanks for your posts.

i once heard a quote that if you want to apologise to a girl, let her anger cool down first, and then tender your apology... maybe there is a proper time for a thing to have desired effect.... hammer the iron when hot sort of thing... it is often believed, and under quite empirical evidence, that 'behaviours' which have become one's second nature, have indeed been hardwired in their systems and are difficult to change... quite true! but not as gospel a truth, as we have got impression....

as i am lured to give my personal perspective / observation on the thread by reading the wonderful posts given in response to your questions, i can say something, but i myself doubt what i say since i m not experienced as you are... but nevertheless, i wish to contribute to things being said.


compassion, love, attention, sympathy, etc are great words and are noblest gestures of humanity... reiki, and practicing reiki ideology, we promote these feelings in ourselves which all of us do possess in varying degrees... compassion has a great healing potential (generally speaking) but we certainly would observe that giving a compassionate treatment to someone in some situation would not necessarily give desired results.... various people who are sociopaths/psychopaths, have one core problem that is "self-pity".... whether they have guised themselves and infact made themselves convinced that they 'don't care' for anything, but the truth is that no matter how aloof they exhibit from this phenomenon, they do have a 'self-pity'....

self-pity is something that explains the behaviours easily... self-pity is generated in us when we feel vulnerable at the mercy of untoward events/personalities/situations. our self-love is badly hurt when we are abused/misused/treated badly. this creates a cry within us... a cry that cannot be heard outside... then we console ourselves internally... create a 'shell' around our damaged ego/pesonality, and become outrageous on the outside... self-pity is the same thing that starts giving us justification for our bad acts.... we feel 'right' to do bad, since bad was done to us in the first instance.... why us only would suffer, feels every such person and this sets the foundations for his criminal behaviour onwards.....

what would compassion, love and attention do to a person who has developed a mass of self-pity around himself ? would compassion alleviate his this feeling, or will make him take that such compassion being offered to him was his lost right already.... maybe, again maybe, such a person will take compassion and love for granted..... compassion may satisfy his ego in a negative way, making him more arrogant on his bad behaviour...

compassion can be a dual–edged thing, it could cut the wrong way too....

if i were given in such a situation to deal with a pyschopath/sociopath, i will try my best to first make that person realize that has already balanced the score ! i.e, the bad he has done, has been far more than the bad that had been done to him.... this would help him overcome his self-pity, this will bring him out of the 'reactionary personality' gradually.... when reaction ceases, and he starts judging his every act on a stand alone basis, then only he is ready to be given compassion and love....


just my perspective though, maybe entirely wrong.


Mish, the topic you've floated augments an already voiced debate that 'is reiki for everyone' or more carefully speaking, 'can reiki be offered in every situation to somebody' ?

thanks for the topic again


take care

salman

Excellant posts from all here. So much info, it'd be too time-consuming to even use multi-quote to respond.

Some points coming to mind are:

There is some disagreement professionally as to whether sociopaths are different from psychopaths. Some feel psychopaths are a sub-section of sociopaths.

For me & my personal experience, my background ticks the boxes of many traits, but not all. There was no abusive background levied on me. I came from a good family, with no alcohol or drugs in it. A responsibile family, living in good areas. This is important, i'll point out why.

Psychopaths are beleived to be born with their differences, leading many professionals to term it as incurable. Sociopaths on the other hand are beleieved to be somewhat a result of environmental sociological factors.

I can tell you, i agree with cautionary posts here. As far as Reiki folks go, they have generally good hearts, but people of the pathic ways may very well latch onto that, to the practitioners detriment. I'm all for love, really i am, but professional detachment is crucial to say the least here. Boundaries are the first step.

As far as sociopaths go, they simply just do not care, about much really. Incidentally, socipaths are not always violent. No amount of reasoning however will truely have an effect on them. Begs the question, just what brought me around to caring enough to change my life, if i was what psychiatrists believed.

It's important that the one shoe fits all concept is'nt automatically accepted. However, neither is my example everyone example also. I'll post my 'Being Born' part 2 embellishment this afternoon. I been sooo busy last few days. I invite you all to use what my experience to dissect, so that any understandings can be cleaned. It's why i'm coming out of the closet, haha!

warmest wishes
Wayne

Thanks to everyone for their insightful posts above!

I do not have any experience with Reiki and sociopaths/psychopaths so I don't really have any useful contribution here but I wonder if some of the things suggested here e.g. Abuse and self-pity play a part in the reasons why certain people behave as they do in such situations as we have seen recently in the riots in the UK?

I know that there will also be many people who took part in the looting etc. just for copycat reasons and because they saw a chance to get stuff for free without much chance of being caught, there are others who see an opportunity to use easily-influenced people to behave in a way to further their own agenda of social disruption and also those who, through the way they have been brought up (or just ignored) by their parents, have lost, buried or not developed a sense of compassion or a conscience.

Some, if not all of these could probably be helped by Reiki but how one would go about suggesting that to such people, I have no idea! I don't think that they would be likely to ask for a Reiki session! I do agree with Salman that some "preparation" would be required to help reach an understanding that Reiki could help them and they could accept any compassion offered.

As for what "ordinary" people can do to help in such situations, I think it is important for them to try and not buy into the fear that the media hypes up, to try and stay calm and grounded and to continue to try and do even small acts of kindness where possible, so that the inherent goodness in humanity shines through and may eventually illuminate the darkest parts of our society. Hito ni shinsetsu ni (be kind to people).

Colin wrote:
...I wonder if some of the things suggested here e.g. Abuse and self-pity play a part in the reasons why certain people behave as they do in such situations as we have seen recently in the riots in the UK?

It's a good question. Environmental factors will for sure affect different people in different ways. Abuse of the self, is a predominant factor among criminals. Abuse as in drugs, alcohol, losing their freedom, or indeed damage to their psyche by the actions they perform on society.

Self pity comes into play by the 'poor me', i have no choice, no option, no way out. This way of being is very intimate to me.

It's really important though, a tough love aspect is there also. Criminals must be responsible for their own actions. Else nothing else will work. They, we (criminals) would have/do give all manners of reasons why we do such things. Invariably it is used in mitigation in court. i've used it myself. There really is no excuse, or reason, imo.

Colin wrote:
I know that there will also be many people who took part in the looting etc. just for copycat reasons and because they saw a chance to get stuff for free without much chance of being caught, there are others who see an opportunity to use easily-influenced people to behave in a way to further their own agenda of social disruption and also those who, through the way they have been brought up (or just ignored) by their parents, have lost, buried or not developed a sense of compassion or a conscience.

Some, if not all of these could probably be helped by Reiki but how one would go about suggesting that to such people, I have no idea! I don't think that they would be likely to ask for a Reiki session!

Target them when they are at their most vulnerable in their criminal career - in prison. I got into spirituality in prison, via a UK charity. i actually spoke with the director yesterday about other matters. They focus on yoga/mediation. However, although i havn't been involved in crime for many years, a quite old case - driving offences, did mean i recieved an 8 month prison sentence in January 2006. By then i was level 2...

I was in a place, surrounding by much pain, anger, violence, etc. However, because of Reiki, my time was easily spent as a spiritual process. Having the solitude to face some of my own demonds, and, the comfort/insights Reiki brought. I intimated before on here about this, but i spent at least 3 or 4 hours per day in self treatments. Not just becasue i had to, but also because i wanted to. The deep well that was dug then, still makes me smile even now. We all know how Reiki can change all areas of your life, change folks attitudes toward you, and effect all those around you. Well, my prison wing was a really nice place to be, as far as prison goes. I also had a great relationship with the prison officers.

What i'm saying is, that Reiki is the ideal thing to get into prison. Of course, in one way, this deals with after the fact of crime, though it may help re-offending. and treatments are in a controlled, safe (yes safe) environment. No-one would be able to spend time alone with an outside contractor coming into prison if the prisoner wasn't first security cleared. Prison officers in UK are always within a short distance. Anythign around 100-150 yards or less. Panic buttons are strategically placed everywhere.

For targeting crime before it is commited, Reiki could be introduced to youths. Intervention is key. Perhaps via local community centres, etc. Even schools. Getting references from such places after a program of treatments, etc, and bringing those to the local authority may be a step to rolling it out in a larger way.

Colin wrote:
As for what "ordinary" people can do to help in such situations, I think it is important for them to try and not buy into the fear that the media hypes up, to try and stay calm and grounded and to continue to try and do even small acts of kindness where possible, so that the inherent goodness in humanity shines through and may eventually illuminate the darkest parts of our society. Hito ni shinsetsu ni (be kind to people).

Really excellant point. If i can ad the caveat (which i'm certain you weren't ignoring) is that it is easy for the unaffected to try to remain rational, harder for those affected. However, your point of even small acts of kindness, will mean so, so much to people who have lost everything. Little gifts, such small acts of kidness, make one believe once more in humanity, and, can make ones heart flicker aglow again. Long enough to get through the initial shock.

A forum is great for sharing intellect, ideas, etc. A forum, a special forum, such as this, maybe some can take things a little further. Either collectively, or individually. We have great ideas, great love for all, enacting that in a practible way is an idea also.

warmest wishes
Wayne

I really want to thank everyone who answered my initial post and took the time to make such thoughtful and insightful comments. I appreciate everyone's candidness. This is the most enlightening discussion I've ever participated in regarding the subject of psychopathology and sociopathy. You all have given me plenty of food for thought.

Buck, thank you for your openness about your past. My first thought on reading your post was, "oh, I'm so sorry you had to go through that." I know that we all go through what we go through for a reason and I'm glad you're here to give a perspective on homelessness that a lot of us will never have to experience. Mental instability and disease also factors big in my family's background and I, myself, am subject to bouts of depression. So one of the things I'm constantly asking myself over the course of all my spiritual awakenings and Reiki practices is "Is this real?" It can get especially dicey since I believe the Buddhist teaching that life is an illusion. While I do believe each of our lives is what we make of it (or not, depending on what we do with it), I think it can get to be a chaotic mess when I have the realities of over 6 trillion people in the world enroaching on my one reality. Everything is interconnected, after all. But that would be the subject for another thread.

I hadn't thought about the hands-on aspect of Reiki in relation to the possibility of inappropriate behavior, much like some of the problems we've seen in the psychiatric and medical professions. You know, I've been to Reiki share sessions and did hands-on with total strangers in a group environment and we all just took for granted that because we're Reiki, we're automatically okay, non-predatory people. Something tells me that the criminal types who would take advantage of situations like that just haven't "discovered" Reiki yet. Perhaps that might be one argument in favor of having the Reiki trade regulated and licensed like they do the massage trade here in the U.S. But that would also be very sad, because the licensing costs and regulations could also drive a lot of very gifted healers right out of the field. So it's a Catch-22, I think.

I like your term "responsible compassion" and that helps me a great deal in deciding how to deal with the predatory and manipulative people in my life and in my Reiki practice. I used to be one of those people who gave dollar bills out to the panhandlers. But after having to go to the Food Bank for a couple of months after losing my job, I see things from both sides and, like you, I know there are plenty of very good facilities set up to help people. I've sold belongings and pawned them to get money to buy food and pay my utilities, but I've never had to panhandle to get money, except in high school back in the Seventies when we kids did it just for kicks to get cigarrette money.

And, yes, I agree that it may be time for Reiki practitioners to "come out," so to speak and talk about their pasts and who they are. I envision a time, hopefully very soon in the future, when Reiki will not just be a healing modality, but a vehicle for transforming lives, much as Wayne's and yours and mine have been transformed by it. "Transformative Reiki," if you will. Isn't that what it was originally? I think, if I remember my Reiki history correctly, that before it was called Reiki, it was given to Dr. Usui as a form of transformative spiritual practice and that he introduced it as a spiritual practice, not a healing modality. The healing part, I believe, was just a side effect that came later. Maybe that part has gotten lost in the translation in the West, much as Yoga has been transformed into more-or-less a form of exercise here in the United States.

Salman, I think you've hit the nail on the head, so to speak, with the self-pity observation. And we have all felt self-pity at one time or another, too, so, yes, perhaps by getting a person to the point where they can feel some closure to the abuses they've experienced in their pasts, they can finally accept responsibility for what they've done in the present. Maybe this explains why a child-molester can grow up and molest kids themselves. Being molested as a child would be a pretty difficult thing to come to closure about. But then there is the paradox of why some people who were molested as kids don't grow up to be child molesters themselves. There seems to be no logic to what makes one grow up and do one thing and another person with the same or similar background doesn't.

Jim, I find your observation that the sociopaths and borderline personalities you've had contact with wouldn't accept a Reiki treatment to be very interesting. I agree they are energy sensitive and intuitive. That's been my experience as well. I crudely compare them to a shark being able to pick up the scent of blood a mile away. Put a predatory, manipulative person in a roomful of people and see how quickly s/he makes a beeline for the most vulnerable, naive, open-hearted and emotionally weak person there. I've seen it happen to others and it's happened to me a few times, even though I try to make it a point to stay away from those types of people. If only I could be that energy sensitive and intuitive in my Reiki practice! It makes me wonder if the OBE's during abuse (and reading that part of your post made me very sad) causes a sort of psychic break, as well as a psychological one. And that not only are they compensating in life through a sort of warped psychological defense, but also a psychic one as well. So they develop a super-intuitive sense of picking up on those energetic cues that others give off. As a sort of survival mechanism, as you alluded to. Just one more reason to surround ourselves with Light and psychic protection whenever we do our practice.

Colin, I too have been watching the news of the U.K. riots and am very disturbed. It reminds me of the Rodney King riots we had in Los Angeles back in the Nineties. I think something energetic definitely goes on during the frenzy of rioting - anger and fear are negative energies. It's almost like an energetic "virus" that everyone who goes out in the vicinity of a riot just gets caught up in it. Juxtapose what's going on in the U.K. with the fairly peaceful demonstrations in Egypt earlier this year that led to the downfall of the Mubarak regime.

I suppose my questions about psychopathology will never be completely answered until we completely understand what causes a human being to be what they are. And I don't think we're ever gonna know that, at least not here in this physical realm. Pachamama, I agree with you, I believe there's always hope. As long as there is a beating heart, there is hope to change it.

Thank you all again. So glad I found this group!

Mish

dharmabytes wrote:

Jim, I find your observation that the sociopaths and borderline personalities you've had contact with wouldn't accept a Reiki treatment to be very interesting. I agree they are energy sensitive and intuitive. That's been my experience as well. I crudely compare them to a shark being able to pick up the scent of blood a mile away. Put a predatory, manipulative person in a roomful of people and see how quickly s/he makes a beeline for the most vulnerable, naive, open-hearted and emotionally weak person there. I've seen it happen to others and it's happened to me a few times, even though I try to make it a point to stay away from those types of people. If only I could be that energy sensitive and intuitive in my Reiki practice! It makes me wonder if the OBE's during abuse (and reading that part of your post made me very sad) causes a sort of psychic break, as well as a psychological one. And that not only are they compensating in life through a sort of warped psychological defense, but also a psychic one as well. So they develop a super-intuitive sense of picking up on those energetic cues that others give off. As a sort of survival mechanism, as you alluded to. Just one more reason to surround ourselves with Light and psychic protection whenever we do our practice.

My post was very direct and not really politically correct, considering the comments shared by others...i`m glad it didn`t offend you...

I moved to a transient boom town in a rather remote part of Canada 3 years ago...I have seen all manner of wounded people here... including predators...This is a place where people go missing far above the national average...a corrupt town on the edge of wilderness...the wild west...It`s been an interesting lesson...and, as i am most of the things you mentioned that attract predators, well for me at least...school`s been in since the day i got here...time to go home...schools out.

I had the same thought regarding the O.B.E.`s...I think it`s an indicator that the person has changed in an irreversible way...

It`s been nice talking with you...

Jim

dharmabytes wrote:

Salman, I think you've hit the nail on the head, so to speak, with the self-pity observation. And we have all felt self-pity at one time or another, too, so, yes, perhaps by getting a person to the point where they can feel some closure to the abuses they've experienced in their pasts, they can finally accept responsibility for what they've done in the present. Maybe this explains why a child-molester can grow up and molest kids themselves. Being molested as a child would be a pretty difficult thing to come to closure about. But then there is the paradox of why some people who were molested as kids don't grow up to be child molesters themselves. There seems to be no logic to what makes one grow up and do one thing and another person with the same or similar background doesn't.

IMO this is for a number of reasons, though just so we dont get side-tracked) folks who have had some form, any form of abuse and commit crimes later, are only a small percentage of the total picture of offenders.

To answer the paradox, no single environmental factor can be took to explain, or predict crime. It's a multi-layered subject, comprising many different sociological ingredients.

Re: Sexual crimes. I'm not as knowledgeable in this as other crimes, but i've lived alongside sex offenders in prison. A factor with them is that when they were young the acts were possibly the only human contact they got. Many will feel that this is an appropriate way, perhaps the normal way, of showing affection. One sex offender i met in prison, i asked him why he done what he did. He told me he loved his daughter, but in the wrong way. In the UK, this is why the prison service has the SOTP (sex offender treatment program). The offender cant seem to understand how inappropriate their behaviour is. Yes, they will know it is illegal, but that is different from them feeling whether they should act a certain way or not morally. This is equally valid to ordinary offenders, and indeed sociopaths.

Warmest wishes
Wayne

Hi Wayne,

Milarepa wrote:

Re: Sexual crimes. I'm not as knowledgeable in this as other crimes, but i've lived alongside sex offenders in prison. A factor with them is that when they were young the acts were possibly the only human contact they got. Many will feel that this is an appropriate way, perhaps the normal way, of showing affection. One sex offender i met in prison, i asked him why he done what he did. He told me he loved his daughter, but in the wrong way. In the UK, this is why the prison service has the SOTP (sex offender treatment program). The offender cant seem to understand how inappropriate their behaviour is. Yes, they will know it is illegal, but that is different from them feeling whether they should act a certain way or not morally. This is equally valid to ordinary offenders, and indeed sociopaths.

Warmest wishes
Wayne

I met a person like this also. When we got to discussing her relationship with another person that i felt was inappropriate...I was told that..."You don`t understand love between two human beings"

So sure, we have intellectual or moral stop signs, possibly taught to us by example, but also I believe we may have protective traits that are instinctive towards our kids...these instincts seem to be absent as well ..

Ya know it was very frustrating to be around these folks and not be able to do much for them...there were alot of anxiety prone moments where I belive reiki could have been a great benefit.
Yet, after some time I wondered about the affects of reiki to initiate change in someones life. A few years ago when i was treating others daily, a noticeable amount of my clients were having realizations about all the things that didn`t work for them in their lives...We all know that reiki does this well. It can allow us to step aside and view ourselves almost from a non personal point of view, which can give us the opportunity to see ourselves with more honesty...the fear is removed from what we may find, so its safe to look.

dahrmabytes and I are in agreement that some of these people have have become sensitive to their environment in a way that others are not.I have wondered if they can sense on some level that to accept reiki is to possibly initiate change in their lives that they cannot control. I know some of these people have tried intensive couselling and walked away, some after years of therapy..."no faith in the system"...no doubt a factor, yet i have told that to "fix the past you have to relive it, and I`ve been trying to forget it my whole life, so the psychologists can kiss my..." I don`t think some can face it, and i`m not sure how one should feel about that considering what they have already been through.It definitly presses my compassion button...



Jim

When i got involved with Reiki, it was to heal my drug addiction. What is also done was give me a conscience. Something i never had before. Typical of course with sociopaths. That conscience gave birth to incredible guilt and personal responsibility. The sociopathic ways were greatly lessened from that.

Sociopaths, being only really concerned with themselves, it was typical i only thought of myself to sort out. The pain i caused the rest of the world wasn't important. Yet, as Reiki will of course do, it affects many areas of ones life.

So, even someone like a sociopath, if they experienced Reiki for whatever selfich reason, for abolutely whatever reason could be devised, it may create a magnificent catalyst. Something they really never expected, but totally turned their life around. I know it did for me...

Can Reiki cure or help such a condition? As you're all going to read once i post within the hour, this life certainly has made a marked difference. An exceptional one. Said factually, with no ego.

Should Reiki be used to help such people? Of course. From the most terrible existence something great can grow. The idea that people on a spiritual path would collectively feel sociopaths should not have the chance i have had, would be abhorrent.

If it is a question of safety, the option is there to bring Reiki into a controlled environment for them. Be it prison or mental hospital.

This is possibly some things to look at with socipaths & Reiki.

warmest wishes
Wayne

Cheers to you Wayne, for being so courageous, and so bold here. Even for those who were never sociopaths, wouldn't we admit that our natural compassion has blossomed-- and in some cases, truly become a dominant part of us now?

Odd, amazing insights happen during giving Reiki. Once I had to treat someone whose nasty, hostile behavior I was truly irked by. I was honestly even judgemental about her behavior. As I started to treat her, something amazing happened. I could very clearly feel and understand the woman's stress, helplessness, and fear in those situations where she acted out. I ached at her vulnerability, felt her stress and helplessness and inability to cope. I was suffused with a deep love and warmth and I only wanted to soothe, heal, comfort, and protect her. All this just from a quickie Reiki treatment.

Now if a sociopath were giving regular treatments, might that open up his or her compassion channel, and permit them to sense things from another's perspective, allow them to empathize, to care-- to love? I'm not sure. But I can imagine it might increase awareness and perhaps foster compassion.

Thank you for being brave enough to share, Wayne!

thanks sunflower. I'd wrote my other being born topic earlier. took me ages, then fo rsome reason i was logged out as iw as posting it, so i lost it. i've took that as it's not right to share atm.

you've made a great point, bout compassion. this i wil share. i never cared for anyone except me. such a selfish, nasty person really. i got into reiki to help my drug addiction, out of pure survival. this was itself selfish, cause i couldnt give a shit still about anyone else i'd hurt, only myself. i also never wanted to leave gangs fully then either.

what reiki done, within days, was give me immense guilt, which i still have, and i think i don't want not to have sounds crazy, and i've been told to try to get rid of it. here;s the thing, i never give a shit for so long, now i do, extremly. it feels important to me, maybe theraputic to have the guilt. this wil prob not be understandable to most. extreme way of being for an extreme past. anyhow, with responsibility came conscience & guilt. i'm pretty normal now, maybe with some quirks sure. i'm very easy going, becuase i;ve expoerienced so much extreme stuff, not much fazes me. i do tend to speak my mind, and talk very direct. this is mistook sometimes as me being upset. Other than that, i feel pretty normal. Reiki helped me be normal, and it has been quite a novelty.

if one was to approach a sociopath offer reiki with a view to them feeling compassion, i wager they'd not be interested. if however, it was offered in some way that appealed to their selfish interests, then it might be accepted. I dunno, perhaps as a relaxation experience, maybe just to get out of the prison cell, it doesn't matter really. what is great bout reiki is that it will toch other unexpected parts of ones live of it's own accord. that's the bigger picture.

Even sociopaths experience weak points in their lives, it's then that they'd be most approachable, prob best in controlled environment. however, there are varying degrees of how sociopaths act, and not all are violent. a distinction must be made between them and psychopaths.

wamrest wishes
Wayne

just reading those links you posted again Wayne.....

haven't read all your blog sections...but one thing that comes to mind for me when thinking of gangs..is that 'oneness of gang consciousness' that comes to the fore in riot situations.
I waffled on again, sorry to go off on a tangent on this very inetersting thread..I should have popped this somewhere els.

Pachamama...............
your wonderful posting has been moved
to the coffee section under the heading
Sociology 'Oneness of gang consciousness'