how to change the negative habits that cause stress and pain in our lives

habits can be controlled and even changed. we normally think that habits have been acquired by us since childhood and cannot be changed or that we have inherited some traits from our ancestors.... in actual fact habits are acquired over a certain period... to replace an old habit or make a new one is to do a particular action for about 21 days at the same set time every day. this then forms a habit. eg brushing your teeth every day at 6.30 a.m. and before going to bed, saying your prayers at a certain time every day etc.. the unconscious mind takes 21 days to take on the task for repeated working....

similarly our actions to situations can be changed from negative to positive. actually we are not responsible for 10 % of what happens in a situation but we are responsible to the 90 % of what happens after our reaction to a particular situation....let me explain by an example... everyone gets ready for going out, the father to go to his office, the child to go to school. suddenly the child drops the glass of milk it is drinking and in the process there is milk on the table as well as the father's clothes...here, the incident was an accident for which no one is responsible but lets see the reaction from two different angles...
a) the father gets annoyed with the child and creates a racus and then goes to change his clothes...the child starts crying as a result of which the child's mood gets upet and she misses the school bus, the father has to drop the child to school and in the process the child gets a scolding from the teacher and the father's boss is unhappy with his late appearance in office especially when there is an important meeting going on.. the wife is upset with the behaviour of her husband and in the evening when they all meet it is bad mood for everyone and the blame game continues....

b) the father says never mind accidents do happen and goes to change his clothes.. the child is appy that there is no scolding and goes to catch the school bus, the wife is also happy that her husband behaves in a mature manner and is ready to handle any situation. the father reaches the office in time and everything goes well in the office...so when the three meet at home in the evening all are in good mood....

so, here the bad situation has done a turn around to bring out the goodness in all....

in the book "many lives many masters" written by brian l weiss talks about the lessons to be learned by all of us and the fact that we have to come again and again till the lessons are learned is true enough. the book also talks about past life regression, the period between deaths and rebirth or the resting phase, and how we move up or down in our advancement...the main lesson to be learned, i think, is compassion and love for mankind and all living things.... till we learn to think positively and love all living things without wishing to harm intentionally or unintentionally any living thing, our lessons will have to be repeated by us comming down again and again.....

renukakkar wrote:habits can be controlled and even changed. we normally think that habits have been acquired by us since childhood and cannot be changed or that we have inherited some traits from our ancestors.... in actual fact habits are acquired over a certain period... to replace an old habit or make a new one is to do a particular action for about 21 days at the same set time every day. this then forms a habit. eg brushing your teeth every day at 6.30 a.m. and before going to bed, saying your prayers at a certain time every day etc.. the unconscious mind takes 21 days to take on the task for repeated working....

similarly our actions to situations can be changed from negative to positive. actually we are not responsible for 10 % of what happens in a situation but we are responsible to the 90 % of what happens after our reaction to a particular situation....let me explain by an example... everyone gets ready for going out, the father to go to his office, the child to go to school. suddenly the child drops the glass of milk it is drinking and in the process there is milk on the table as well as the father's clothes...here, the incident was an accident for which no one is responsible but lets see the reaction from two different angles...
a) the father gets annoyed with the child and creates a racus and then goes to change his clothes...the child starts crying as a result of which the child's mood gets upet and she misses the school bus, the father has to drop the child to school and in the process the child gets a scolding from the teacher and the father's boss is unhappy with his late appearance in office especially when there is an important meeting going on.. the wife is upset with the behaviour of her husband and in the evening when they all meet it is bad mood for everyone and the blame game continues....

b) the father says never mind accidents do happen and goes to change his clothes.. the child is appy that there is no scolding and goes to catch the school bus, the wife is also happy that her husband behaves in a mature manner and is ready to handle any situation. the father reaches the office in time and everything goes well in the office...so when the three meet at home in the evening all are in good mood....

so, here the bad situation has done a turn around to bring out the goodness in all....

in the book "many lives many masters" written by brian l weiss talks about the lessons to be learned by all of us and the fact that we have to come again and again till the lessons are learned is true enough. the book also talks about past life regression, the period between deaths and rebirth or the resting phase, and how we move up or down in our advancement...the main lesson to be learned, i think, is compassion and love for mankind and all living things.... till we learn to think positively and love all living things without wishing to harm intentionally or unintentionally any living thing, our lessons will have to be repeated by us comming down again and again.....

I thought it took 29 days to see changes.
Does the body's cells change every 21 days
or 29

i can't say about cell change.

but it is 21 days as the cleansing period in reiki, 7 is the number of days in a week, there are seven heavens( so they say) we agree to 7 vows at the time of marriage(in hinduism, we circle the agni 7 times when we get married). 7 is a pious number it is the day of rest. every prayer is either three times/ 5 times or 7 times or even nine times.

To change our habits we have to
change our cells that crave their
favorite food/drink.

Ah yes we have the 7 deadly sins
The 7 Beatitudes Of Revelation
I made my confirmation at 7

maybe it takes 29 days for cells to change. but it takes 21 days to form a good habit. perhaps that is why we are to practice reiki every day, at about the same time daily for 21 days.