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Upon joining 'Eight Winds Reiki', a Reiki group on Facebook, the groups admid, Charlie Mayer, asked me what my Reiki connection was.......
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(Ponder for a moment on, and take a lil time to consider what this question might mean to YOU, and how YOU, would possibly go about answering it!.... )
I gave a somewhat automatic, formal/impersonal response.., as if at a job interview..., reciting a speach. The truth is, I think, this is the first time I have introduced myself with this title, and as I read the words they had a long echoing ring to them.... and an aftertaste......
<<<"State your rank souljah!">>>
<<<"Usui Shiki Ryoho Reiki Master/teacher. 10 years in practice (SIR!)">>>.,
........came my reply..., as if I'd rehersed it infront of a mirror......
I felt kinda put on the spot. As if I only had a couple seconds to answer. To be honest I didn't really know what to answer... "What is my Reiki connection?!", I thought to myself. This is infact a very deep and personal question............................................................
.....................................In the following lines/paragraphs I shall endevour to answer this question, honestly, passionatley and with the utmost respect and gratitude for my Reiki teachers, my mentors, my family, my friends & foes..., myself(!!!)..... and for the incredible phenomenon istelf, that is,'Reiki'!
{You all know who you are!!!
}Foreword
What I'm writing.., or much more what I am about to write, is as much for me as for anyone that happens to be reading this right now..... Without you I wouldn't be sitting here!.... I'm saying this, because you are all my "Reiki Connection".
Before I get started though, I'd just like to mention..., or much more make a point of..... the fact....... that,.... I do not carry my Reiki Master/teacher title lightly!!..... And I have some conflicts with myself about whether this is infact an appropriate title. It sure does, in and of itself, have an emense effect on me.... While honoring this title, I will, first and foremost, always be a student.
"~ Just for today; I will let go of worry, I will let go of anger, I will be humble and do my work honestly, I will be kind to every living thing.~ "
- .Alternatively....: "just for today; I will not worry, I will not anger, I will be humble and honest in my work, I will be kind to every living thing."-
(I prefer the former version, as the negative 'dont's' (which the brain cannot make sense of), are replaced by positive affirmations; "I will vs. I wont".... Much more effective from an NLP perspective. And reciting these precepts is meant to serve the purpose of reminding us to be mindful,....and also to remind us...,to try... to be the best that we can be..., in all aspects of our lives.... and to live in the present moment!)
These are The Five Reiki Precepts as given to us by Mikao Usui
***Gassho***
Becoming/being a Reiki Master for me, means, truely honouring these guidlines being true to and honest to myself, everybody else and this title. While at the same time not taking myself or anything else too seriously...., and God help me if I Do!? or I Dont!? (LOL)....And of course as a "bonus" it allows/enables/empowers and qualifies me to teach others in the art of Reiki. Of course this does not mean that I'm superhuman, that I'm superior to anybody else...that I'm a guru or that I am a saint!
No, for me, it means, I have chosen to carry a bigger responsibilty, to commit myself to the art and path of Reiki, to helping others and to proactively work towards a brighter future for the higher good of all! Not just so I can live comfortably ever after.
This is my Oath to myself..., and my promise to you! (and you may quote me on this...AND kick my ass if I don't stay true to these words!).
To be continued.........
When I first became aware of Reiki I was very ill, in hospital and close to death. So my first experience of it was that it is a healing, loving energy...My opinion of it hasn't changed much since.
When I started learning Reiki myself it was much the same. But like many of you here, in my practice I did not notice/experience anything different in my perception. My teacher and friend Maire, assured me though that this was fine, and that my perception would develope with time and practice. It hadn't been long since I was out of hospital so I had a lot of healing to do. Not just from the illness, but from the state I had been in, which had landed me there in the first place.
You see, my initiation process had begun a long time before I had become aware of Reiki. I was 17 years old and I'd just dropped out of school to start a cheffing career. I wasn't at all sure whether cheffing was the right thing for me but I'd had enough of school and the whole system as such. I love food and traveling and I had grown up in a family-run hotel & restaurant business. So it seemed like a good place to start. And it was, but I had also been suffering from depression for numerous reasons for a long time. Back then my therapy consisted mostly of "sex, drugs & rock&roll".
It worked for a while and I did have some spiritual experiences along the way... but it was inevitable for me that at some point I would hit a wall there, methaphorically and/or litterally.... Either way I knew I was headed in no good direction.
After having decided to become a chef I went to Germany to get some work experience with chefs that had worked with us in our hotel in Ireland in the past. My life was a rollercoaster of ups and downs at this point and my time in germany was no exception and of course it too turned out to be more than "just work experience".
The following september after what can only be described as... "fear & loathing in Germany & Connemara"...., I had decided that cheffing was the way for me to go. As I had, despite everything else, been able to work well and even find joy in the kitchen and the crazy life style it promised... Having been influenced by people like Anthony Burdain, I was sure this was gonna be the right thing for me. The hectic lifestyle also insured that I wasn't entertaining any depressing or suicidal thoughts. But I was just ignoring myself more than anything else, and deep down I knew that.
I started the cheffing college in Galway GMIT that September. And our family hotel and home had been sold that summer... My parents had split up a long time before this. My mom and siblings remained in Ireland and my father moved back to Germany with his new family. I moved into a student village across from the college. I had a four bedroom house to myself with a keycard that opened the front door and the door to my bedroom... A pretty stale and lonely place to be in. And not having made any friends their yet...., it was early days... I had too much time to myself and depression started rearing it's ugly face again. I didn't like College either, it was all to much like school... I soon made some freinds though and it wasn't long before I would spend most of my time getting high instead of attending lectures. At weekends I would go back to my hometown and stay at my mom's place.
One of these weekends would turn out to be the catalyst for my ending up in hospital and a long healing journey, my encounter with Reiki my being here now and writing this story.
My depression had kicked in again full trottle and I had some money problems. I owed someone, what was for me quite a bit of cash at the time and I was unsure of how I would swing it this time....It wasn't a bank-loan, put it that way. So not something I could by any honest means, explain to my family without losing my face.
Along with my depression my less pleasant self and demeanor also reared it's ugly mug... A part of me, that usually my family would only get to meet... as I didn't feel like I needed to put on any masks at home. And this most likely was the cause of a huge argument I had with my mother on this faithful weekend.
I ended up leaving earlier and on bad terms with my mom... It had been a heated argument, and we both parted from one another with visible resentment toward each other...Saying that, my resentment towards myself had grown more than anything else...
I met up with some old mates from my hometown that were also living in Galway at the time. We went bowling... I thought it might help to get my mind off of things. Later that evening I walked home by myself. Back to that cold, empty, stale place... left with nobody to talk to but myself and God. I was quite sick of my own company at this point... so I turned to God. Something I hadn't done in a LONG time... unless it was my middle finger pointed up at the sky. I was never very religious, although having grown up in a catholic school I built my own beliefs from an early age... I did believe in something like God or a higher intelligence... anyway my point is I wasn't a church-gower and I didn't pray... apart from the prayers we had to recite in school which I didn't find, connected me with much... or anything at all. I had my own beliefs about reincarnation and such before I had ever even heard of hinduism or buddhism...
Anyway I was lying on my bed and decided to give it a go... I had nothing to lose... So I pleaded with "God" to not let me wake up the following day... But with all my heart... a couple of tears rolled down my cheeks and that sealed the deal.
I woke up the following morning at about 6am. the first thing I noticed was how dehydrated I was... I wasn't even thinking about the night before or my little conversation with God. The next thing I noticed was an extreme pain in my hip. I couldn't explain this to myself because I had been fine walking home from bowling the night before... I got up and limped downstairs to get a drink... My fridge was empty, so I got a glass of tapwater...and proceeded to drink it fast... Within seconds I was running to the bathroom to puke it up. I knew something was up with me then. I went back to my bed and tried to figure out what to do. So I looked at my watch and decided I was in no shape to go to college... and I couldn't stay in this place by myself. So I decided I would get the bus back home to Clifden at 11:30. So at 11:00 I got up and limped across to the college, drew some money from the atm, baught a can of sprite and ordered a taxi... People in the college were looking at me funny already... The taxi came and I sat in the back. The taxi driver turned around and said "where to?..."To the CIE bus station, please." I replied. "You not feelin too well?..taking the day off?!", he asked. "Nah not feelin too hot at all... gonna go home". - "whatever you do, don't go to the doctor", he said, "they'll only give ya fuckin antibiotics!!". I managed a half smile and said "Don't worry I wont, some of Mom's "good old chicken soup" will do the trick".
I got on the bus. An hour and a half journey ahead of me. Dying from thirst, I opened the can of sprite and took a sip... and another..., to my surprise and relief I was able to keep it down. (I had attemepted to drink water a couple times after that first attempt that morning, each with the same result). So this sprite kept me going on that bus drive which seemed to go on forever.
Finally I was the last person to limp off the bus and the driver looked at me funny... I went straight to the pharmacy... and quite dramatically burst in the door exclaiming, "Listen!? I don't know what's goin on with me but I just got off the bus from Galway, I need help...!!!... I've been Dying all morning!!!!" ( Rolling Eyes Laughing ) There was this funny look again and they said, "Sorry, we can't help you, the surgery is closed till 3:00." So I backed out the door again...It was only 1pm now and 2 hrs seemed like an eternity.
I knew where one of the doctors lived though. Sophie, a french lady, who's daughter I used to go to school with and whom I also got along with. She was a close friend of my mom's also..., and she lived across the road. So I went there to try my luck. I went to the back door and there she was having breakfast in the kitchen... I knocked on the door, thinking to myself "she must have had a late night..."
She opened the door, greeted me and let me in. I said, "hi Sophie" and appologized that I was interrupting her breakfast but stressing that it wasn't a social-call and explained my situation. She politely offered me tea and some breakfast. I thankfully declined, stressing my situation again. Maybe not dramatically enough, as she proceeded to enjoy her breakfast and began small talk. I bit my lip and remined myself to just be grateful that I was atleast indoors now and in good hands...well a doctor's anyway. Laughing
Finally, when she was done with her breakfast and filling me in on the goss', she took my temperature and blood pressure. I had a fever and if the looks I was getting all morning were anything to go by I also looked like death. She gave me some paracetamol and some painkillers and a pint glass of water... Once again I explained my situation to her and that I was unable to keep any fluids in me apart from the can of sprite that had sustained me on the bus trip. She insisted though and offered me her bed and asked me if she should call my mom... I agreed that that was probably best. So, as she insisted, I took the pills and downed them with the pint of water infront of her.
I limped upstairs to her bedroom, not being a stranger to the house, I knew where it was. I currled up in two duvets... I was getting worse by the minute and I was freezing and sweating at the same time... Within seconds I had to get up and raced to the bathroom and just about managed to get there in time to spew the pint and the tablets down the toilet.
I lay back down and waited for my mom to arrive. Finally she came and Sophie called me downstairs. As I made the turn to the stairs I met her eyes looking at me from the front door entrance.... she didn't look impressed... Sophie filled her in and gave her the same tablets again stressing that I needed to drink a lot. It wasn't untill we were in the car and half way home that my mom switched from "pissed off", to worried and concerened, when she realised the state I was in.
When we got home, she also insisted that I take the tablets Sophie had given her with a pint of water again... I also tried to explain to her that I wouldn't be able to keep it down....and refused it and went upstairs to bed... She Followed me upstairs and gave me the pint of water and the tablets. She wasn't going anywhere untill she was satisfied that I had taken them with the water. So I said "ok, but dont say I didnt warn you."
She had barley gotten down the stairs when I screamed "MOM!!!!... I NEED A BUCKET NOW...!!!". But it was too late... I projectile vomitted the contents of the glass and the tablets across the cieling like a volcanic erruption.
Now she really realised that there was something extremely wrong with me. I also knew and now, for the first time that day, I remembered the little dialogue I'd had the night before with me, myself and I (and whoever else was listening scratch ).
I felt the life force leaving me and I realised that I was getting what I had asked for...I was on the way out...and the panic and fear I'd had which had braught me home had left me and I was ready to go. Instead my mom was starting to panic and she said she wanted to take me to hospital. I lied to her saying as softly as I could, "Mom, I'll be fine... all I need is some rest.. please". But she was having non of it. She called Sophie and asked her what she should do. Sophie replied that, well, if I didn't wanna go she couldn't force me... I think my mom hung up. She came back to me and said either you get in the car with me now or I'm gonna call an ambulance... I gave in eventually... I didn't have the strength to argue with her anyhow... and I didn't fancy the drama of being carried out of my bed by paramedics. So, somehow I made it to the car. I could hardly walk at this stage... We drove all the way back to Galway, as there is no proper hospital in Clifden. When we got there they had to get me a wheelchair and wheeled me into A&E.
We were greeted by a nurse and soon a doctor arrived on the scene. He told me to lift my top... I obliged... and too my surprise I was covered in red dots all over my torso.
I was given a big injection of...., I dunno..., elctrolytes probably... and antibiotics. Diagnosis: Meningitis.... I was put into isolation and was kept in there for nearly 3 weeks.
I was put on a drip and I was under constant observation 24/7, having my my eyelids pulled back while I was asleep and having bright torches shun into my eyes.... For me it was no laughiung matter... ( Laughing ) And I didn't feel lucky to be there.
Finally, I'd had my prayers answered...there was a God afterall... and I was goin home....
"Can't a man die in peace!?!" I thought.... Rolling Eyes
It wasn't to be.... there were other plans for me. (Enter Maire! My Reiki teacher to be...) I was in isolation and only immediate family members were allowed to visit me. Maire was my mom's best friend at the time. I had only ever met her a couple of times, but we never really talked much... she seemed like a lovely lady though. she offered my mom that she would give me distance Reiki treatments, but said that she would need my permission to do so.
My mom told me about Maire's offer, and in her own words, attempted to describe to me, what Maire had told her about Reiki. I thought about it... I didn't know what I was getting myself into..., but I thought it couldn't harm. So I agreed.
My mom came to visit me every day. A one & a half hour drive in and out of Galway... never knowing what kind of state or mood she would find me in.
In the evenings I began to feel something strange. As if there was a presence with me in the room... like I was being watched... or my mind being read... and emotions were coming up. This was my first experience of Reiki. A few days of this had passed and I still didn't know when or if I was ever gonna get out of there... I wasn't in the clear yet. One morning a nurse came in to change my drip. After she had stabbed my arm with the needle for the 6th time I lost it and I tossed her tray across the room and demanded her to stop and get someone that knew what they were doing! They didn't have it easy with me in there.... Anyway another nurse came and she got it first time. But the ordeal had left me in a sour mood. And when my mom arrived that day... I jsut didn't want to see or hear anyone... so I blocked my ears with my hands untill she left.
A while later she told me that Maire, whom she had been visiting every evening after coming to see me in hospital, had warned her, that during her Reiki session with me, the evening before that incident, that she had seen me very clearly as if I had been in the room with her... and that I was blocking my ears.
When I heard this story I knew what I had felt those evenings in isolation in my hospital bed hadn't been me being paranoid or imagining things. And I was determined to find out more about Reiki.
When I finally got out I was eager to meet Maire and to talk to her. So after a few weeks we met and she did a hands-on Reiki session with me. We talked for a long time afterwards. She told me I was an old soul and that I had been here before, many times...
I won't go into details here because this rant is already getting longer than I had planned and I want to get to my point.
I learned two important things from this.... One that we are never alone. And two that we can do amazing things with our will, with our thoughts and our emotions.
Through my "prayers being answered", I realised that the phrase "be careful what you wish for" held more truth than what I had previously believed. I learned that we can make things manifest when we enrgize our thoughts with emotion and the will of our hearts. And not only in or for ourselves but also in and for others... I learned this through the distance Reiki sessions I recieved from Maire.
I was still very down after I got out, but I had a new outlook on life and a new ambition. Later Maire offered to initiate me into Reiki. and of course I accepted! I was excited. I was attuned to CKR with level one. she did tell me that this was not usual practice but she felt that she should do so with me. It helped me a lot... but I wasn't feeling much and at times I thought that maybe I was doing something wrong. Maire had explained to me about what happens during the attunements and each level respectfully. A couple of years later I told maire I was ready for Reiki 2 and asked her if she would attune me. she didn't ask for any money but she had told me before about the costs .. and Takata's story of Usui... I didn't have much at the time but I gave her 50 euros.
Anyway, before this turns into another rant.... Along with the 2 new symbols I was attuned to in the initition came the explanation of how these symbols would be used and how they could be useful. SHK to connect with the mental/emotional, superconscience or "Godhead" and HSZSN to transcend time and space to send Reiki over distance and to any point in the past or future.
So when that book and later the film "The secret" came out and there was this big hype about it... I was like "yeah, yeah... I already know!" Laughing
I think Reiki can be used for more than just healing... I think it has an unlimited potential and intelligence and that it will work with you as long as you come from the heart. That hypnotic state I was in when I had that lil' "mano e mano" with the creator... between sleep and wakefulness, call it theta/alpha... creates a bridge to the subconcious mind.... I believe that through the use of the SHK symbol or wisdom instilled into it we can bridge this gap too. And the thoughts, wishes and emotions we have can be energized through Reiki also. Call it combining Reiki with creative visualisation if you will... whatever you want to call it... it works for me.
So my advice to me and anybody new to this forum, is this:.... The secret of inviting happiness through many blessings.....
The spiritual medicine for all illness......
Just for today: Be free of anger; Be free of worry;
Be humble
Be honest in your work
Be compassionate to yourself and others
Do gassho every morning and evening
Keep in your mind and recite.
Life is full of ups and downs, trials and tribulations... Even after all that, and still, to this day, I find myself in pickly situations... and sometimes I make bad decisions... But that's what life is all about. So take all you can from all and any of your experiences... the good, the bad,the ugly and the beautiful... They are all important parts of our learning experience.
And at this point I wanna give special thanks and praise to my mom again, despite all the hardships and probably embaressments I put her through along the way... she was always a guiding force and a pillar in my life and always there when I needed her, untill her dying day. I love you... where ever you may be.
Last edited by LuvSoulJah on Fri Jan 06, 2012 8:48 am; edited 7 times in total
may the sun's energy guide you
) 
